18 th.October.

18 October
Got up, one clock said 1pm and the other 10 45 a.m.
noticed no giro hanging in the door so trusted the second time, and was right to do so.

Yesterday was a waste of time but at least I found out how to access my work,
so revision is on the cards.

Chest is wheezing like a ruptured squeezebox,
Really should have been strong enough to resist temptation yesterday.
Will smoke the remainder and see how it goes.
Must give up soon,

Trying hard enough, well in truth obviously not hard enough or I’d be stopped,
Feel it will happen though.

Nice pleasant sunny day but I’m not in the mood to take advantage of same,

Today I’ll slowly work through both sections of course work and get back up to speed.

The tutor didn’t really have the time to spend on me yesterday she had a full class on p.c.’s.
I sat for nearly half an hour yesterday watching the people of the town going about their business, shopping, eating and drinking.
I hate towns and especially Middlesboro,
Probably because it reminds me of my time spent in an office working for local government.
Sounds better than the Engineers dept. of the county council.

I’m drawn towards the voluntary sector as a means of escapism.

Will never be rich but may be able to improve my life and that of others along the way.

Have got step rate up from 50 to 133 before mild exertion, I.e. out of breath.
At first 50 had me fucked but now am getting used to it and learning to control breathing etc.
Certainly feeling it in the backs of my legs.
Each stint is still only 2.5 minutes but at least I feel as if I’m getting somewhere. 12 sessions would give me the daily 30 mins. Will take a few weeks before full workout is tried.
03:29 PM done half course and am tired.
Bed 11p.m.