21 st. November.

21 November
Been 36 hrs now without a smoke, half way to first hurdle at which I usually fall.
Would love a cigarette but there is nothing left in the flat to make one with,
I’ve made sure of that.
Feeling no different but fine, obviously time will tell.

Very cold today, am thinking of returning to bed till tea time, after all if I’m sat around I’m going to be thinking of a fag but if I last till tea time then the quilt can be used to keep warm.
Hasn’t had the fire on since I bought credit on Sunday.
Quilt does the job well enough.
Spell check seems to have returned! I am glad.
Despite getting enough for two thin cigs yesterday I’m taking the cut off point as being midnight Sunday.
Plenty of sleep /time in bed should see me through the worst few days.
I have tried before and seem to get to three days quite easily then everything goes to pot.
A nice joint would take my head off now.

I breathe in deeply and exhale slowly and remember why I’m putting myself through all this, to be able to breathe better and feel better and be fitter.
My aim this week is to last till Friday, but it’s too early to write down expectations when everyday has to be conquered in line.
I could easily smoke three off the bat, would probably feel ill for doing it.
Funny thing is the tinnitus is present even though I haven’t had a rollie.
It is very high pitched.
Usually on a morning the first rollie causes the sound to be louder and almost painfully high pitched.
At the moment it is just a nuisance against the sounds of the system, clashing chord by chord.
There was a piece yesterday, which said, each hour has to be fought for.

The weather is bleak, cold, windy and grey, my mood is similar.
No not really, even now after so little time I can feel a little achievement. I think of buying some baccy and rationing myself to say five a day or something similar.
MY mind is going to be playing games with me for many days to come. Thoughts of joints, rollies and rationing will abound.
There is only one way to stop and that is totally.
Bloody cold day, always said it would be a cold day in hell when I gave up smoking.

ŸNicotine is one of the most addictive substances on this planet.
Thousands of people try to quit every day, but the incentives just aren’t high enough when compared to the addictive hold of nicotine.
· Why do you want to quit?
· When you tried to quit in the past, what helped and what didn't?
· What will be the most difficult situations for you after you quit? How will you plan to handle them?
· Who can help you through the tough times? Your family? Friends? Health care provider?
· What pleasures do you get from smoking? What ways can you still get pleasure if you quit?

Father phoned, mother has to have operation on knee, she has agreed so next year sometime she will have operation, thankfully, her sister has to have same operation so that will help her through it.
Having a little chew with bullets and format but think have tackled it,
Should be O.K., couldn’t find remove button.

20 Minutes After QuittingYour heart rate drops.
12 hours After QuittingCarbon monoxide level in your blood drops to normal.
2 Weeks to 3 Months After QuittingYour heart attack risk begins to drop.
Your lung function begins to improve.
1 to 9 Months After QuittingYour Coughing and shortness of breath decrease.
1 Year After QuittingYour added risk of coronary heart disease is half that of a smoker’s.
5 Years After QuittingYour stroke risk is reduced to that of a non-smoker’s 5-15 years after quitting.
10 Years After QuittingYour lung cancer death rate is about half that of a smoker’s.Your risk of cancers of the mouth, throat, oesophagus, bladder, kidney, and pancreas decreases.

Find a reason for quitting before you have no choice.

Know that it will take effort to quit smoking. Nicotine is habit forming.
Half of the battle in quitting is knowing you need to quit.

Nearly all smokers have some feelings of nicotine withdrawal when they try to quit.
Give yourself a month to get over these feelings.
Take quitting one day at a time, even one minute at a time—whatever you need to succeed
Half of all adult smokers have quit, so you can— too.
That’s the good news.

There are millions of people alive today who have learned to face life without a cigarette.
For staying healthy, quitting smoking is the best step you can take.
The Crazies usually last for 1–2 weeks after you quit.
After that, your body begins to forget about nicotine and you start feeling better.
The Crazies are a pain, but they only last a little while. And they’re better than dying from something like lung cancer or a heart attack.
Even if smoking doesn’t kill you, it’ll probably make you sick with emphysema or other diseases.

Smoking never solved a single problem or ended a single worry.

Just one won't hurt"- don't believe it! Just one is enough to send you plummeting back to the bottom of the mountain that you have worked so hard to climb.

Believe in yourself, love yourself enough to give yourself the best gift you can...the gift of life.
Fight as if your life depends upon it.... because it does.

Looks like first milestone will be after a week or so when there should be an improvement in lung function,

Care worker called, brought script, doctor has got in touch with my g.p.
Mike will call in about one month’s time.. When I followed him to the door could easily have carried on to car, shop and baccy.

Just finished a nice meal, chop and three veg; obviously would have liked a smoke afterwards.
Had thoughts of going to shop several times during day but lasted out.