11 April.

11 Apr. 07
11a.m. have been up an hour and out of that time have spent 40 minutes in front garden taking grass off. Has got me out of breathe and heart is racing a bit so must be doing good.
Absolute cracker of a morning, no breeze, clear skies with strong sunshine. Not going to try and rush the garden job, just do a little bit and then come inside for a rest. It’s one of those jobs that can sicken you off very very quickly if you let it.
One of the neighbours came by and told me that was how she started to reclaim her garden from the grass; she added I should put a fence up, I thanked her for her advice but said I had no plans for a fence.
In my mind I’m thinking, fence = longevity; how long did I intend to live here?
Have I already made my mind up to stop by making a start upon the garden? I kid myself by saying all I need is somewhere pleasant to lay when my back is hurting.
I do like laying out the front when the weather is right, and time spent laid upon my back is often beneficial. I now want the front to look less like a space taken over by grass and more like a planned garden.
I have a sufficient supply of flowers, which will increase naturally every year allowing a planting scheme to be implemented, using mainly Perennials and the usual mix of annuals for colour and effect.
I had to dig up some docks which has left me an odd shape of ground near the wall of the flat, this area would be ideal for shrubs, but first I will have to severely trim the shrub which is already there; I suspect it belongs to the neighbour but if I accomplish the deed without his knowledge then it will be to late for him to complain.
I’m thinking Fuchsia and Butterfly bush.
I also have to be careful making the distinction between our adjoining land, at the moment it has never mattered, he mows whatever he considers to be his and we usually leave what is deemed ours. If however I put a clear marked area between the properties we will have to see how he reacts.
One thing’s for certain I am not going to fall out over it.
I have reached the point where I no longer keep track of the days without smoking, my breathing is easier and despite still having the odd rasp of the throat or wheeze of the chest I must be getting better.
I didn’t say I felt better, but common sense would say I must be.
I would happily spark up a rollie now. Especially after having accomplished something, i.e. progress in the garden.
So the battle is still very much alive.
My neighbour and I were talking a couple of days ago and he had no baccy and no money, I offered to lend him the money for baccy despite knowing he was trying like me to quit.
He said we would go halves, I replied no; I was willing to lend him the money for a pouch of baccy but all I would want would be a couple of rollies and of course paying back at some time in the near future.
He has got a terrible memory for returning money and goods he has borrowed.
I’ve had my rest, done my first part of daily diary so will go and do another half hour in the sunshine blest fresh air; a commodity with which I have had very little interaction for several months.
I must admit I can only do a few minutes toil and then I have to have a rest but that’s what you get when you have been on tablets that take away your ability to move and function to such an extent as to stop any exercise or thoughts of same for several months.
Perhaps today is my return from the winter hibernation and suffering from the S.A.D. syndrome.
Who gives a f88k I feel happier in myself and that is an important feeling to have.
There is some little bastard riding around on one of those annoying scooter things, revving the arse off it at every chance, I really hate the sound of those fucking machines, even worse than those engine powered stand on scooter things.
I first noticed the latter scooters a bout five years ago in Skegness and said a silent prayer that very day, whilst enjoying a pint in the club. I prayed that the scooter would not become popular in my hometown.
No more that three were seen and since moving here none at all so my prayer has been answered.
There is enough noise pollution with grass cutters, hedge trimmers and other power tools.
I venture out to do some more.
Eventually had enough spadework so decided to go to club.
Had several pints and cadged three rollies before coming home at tea time. Noticed the club now has Internet access, surprised me.
Home, bed.